A MOMENTOUS CHANGE

A microcosm, my personal life mirrors the larger political changes in our country.  What is going on?  Hillary Rodham Clinton is the first woman ever to be elected as Presidential Candidate of a major political party.  It becomes more than probable that she will be our next President of the United States.  How does that affect me?

1.  About Hillary's candidacy, people say, "Enough of male-only leadership.  Forget what has always been.  Let's look seriously at width and depth of experience, a female outlook, wisdom-with-age and see where that can take us."
     My personal life:  I sell my house to my daughter (she's been staying with me off and on over the past four years).  Closing on my house is July 7.  My past tells me I must follow tradition, do what has already worked.  Buy another home, grow more roots, stay close to home and family.  This time, however, my path is not so clear.  What do I want to do with the rest of my life?  Do I really want another home which requires time and resources to maintain and which also keeps me staying in one place?  Why not invest that time and money in my life?  Take the focus off a house, put it on me, see where it can take me?

2.  About Hillary's candidacy, people say, "We need no longer be tethered to a tired, old idea.  We have the ability now to experiment and succeed with a female leader as many other countries have already done.  Consider Indira Gandhi of India; Golda Meir of Israel; Margaret Thatcher of the United Kingdom; Benazir Bhutto of Pakistan; Angela Merkel of Germany; and Aung San Suu Kyi of Myanmar.  These are only six out of a list of more than 25 female leaders of countries.  (Wikipedia)
     My personal life:  I would like not to be tethered to a house.  Instead, I would like to fly, to experiment, to meet people who may be more like me -- whatever that looks like.  Or to meet people who look nothing like me, speak another language, practice different traditions, eat different foods.

3.  About Hillary's candidacy, people say, "These years can be a learning experiment.  See what women like Hillary can do -- success will be hers.  Imagine the role model she will serve for young girls and women."
     My personal life:  I want the last years of my life to be a learning experiment.  What am I capable of doing?  What risks am I willing to take?  Can I make my life exciting again by learning something new while still taking care of myself?  Can I be a success in my own eyes?

My developing plan:

• Rent a small apartment in our nearby city for six months.  See what I can do.  It allows for time and space to see what I really want.  It's a tentative step towards independence, totally on my own since before marriage and no family living with me.
• Will learning to do for myself be enough?  Regular healthcare is nearby.  Commitments to work on current projects here will continue on a weekly basis.  [My candidacy, however, effectively ends when leaving this District.]  Will I also be able to join in with other interesting groups in the city, like a writing group, a dancing group?  Will I become part of smaller communities within a larger community?
• Once I'm free to leave at the end of this six months, will I want to leave?  Will I want to live somewhere else?  Will I still want to experiment, to take risks, to live in another country, speak another language?  Will I have an interest in learning another language during these six months -- to prepare for living in another country?  Or will I decide that living alone in the city is enough?
• Will the first-ever check I receive last week from Montana Senior News for a story I'd written ("Today I Fly") be enough motivation to keep me writing?  To spread my wings through writing so there is no need to go someplace else?  Or will my need to risk and write be the way to go? 
• I want to write.  I want to take risks.   Is this the combination that will make my writing a success, particularly at my age?  Are these the kinds of stories that will motivate others to also take risks in their later years?  The tendency as I get older is to stay comfortable.  I get used to a routine that seems safe but doesn't allow for much excitement in life, or to generate much new learning.  It, instead, allows for my becoming stale, uninteresting, lacking new ideas or freshness.  How to avoid that?  Not sure.  
•  Do I need to be physically moving?  Can I be the one experiencing all the new and the risky and then writing about it?  Can I experience it living in one place or must I go out of my comfort zone in order to write about it? 
• That's what I'm hoping these next six months will tell me.

With Hillary's long journey and many successes along the way, will she be able to achieve her goal of the Presidency?  There's no question that she is ready.  There's no question that she has the ability and experience.  There's no question that she is a positive influence on the rest of us who struggle to achieve our own goals.

What is Hillary's impact?  She shows us how to shoot for the stars.  When she gets knocked down, she jumps back up.  Not once, not even twice, but over and over again.  She is persistent; she never gives up.  "Keep working toward your goals," she models.  And if I don't meet my goals?  Maybe, just maybe, merely trying for them will create a heck of a ride!